4 Fuks Saké

Blur's Hyde Park Set List

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The Prince's Rainforests Project

In the next 24 hours, deforestation will release as much CO2 into the atmosphere as 8 million people flying from London to New York. On that basis, add your signature and ask influential people to do something about it.

Then, return to 4 Fuks Saké and we'll stick to lighter matters.

The Swayze And Wenger Legacies

We now have confirmation courtesy of yesterday's 'Swayze Dead' Twitter trending, that your Mum & Dad will be on Twitter by the end of the year. Not that we were far off anyway. Reading Women's Weekly last night, I couldn't help but notice the magazine take a virulent stand against @schofe for 'tweeting' on his 'Memorial For Dad Weekend Mini-Break'.

Rumour is the most effective vehicle to promote a new communication channel or device. There is a precedent in email.

Yesterday's 'trending' took us all back to the mid 90s, and a tasteful song that stays with us to this day. Generally, a Man United v Arsenal fixture at Old Trafford isn't complete without a 5 minute chant of "Sit down you paedophile," sung vile-ly at Arsene Wenger.

Back in 1996, the UK was on the cusp of embracing email. Only senior management or people you didn't really know, had email addresses. We didn't really get it. Those that did - and the finger at the time was pointed to blokes in the City - recognised you could shuttle information around at rapid pace whether it was true or not.

At 2pm on a random Tuesday I was faxing press releases directly to bins in newsrooms. By 2.30pm, Ian Lessey in accounts was running around the office telling everyone that Wenger had apparently been "busted by cops in a hotel room." By 2.45pm William Hill had stopped taking bets on him being fired and by 4pm, he was on the steps of Highbury issuing a full denial.

By 5pm everyone realised it was total bollocks, was a bit confused, but wanted 'in' on this email thing.

Now everyone knows a little more about how Twitter works. I'm sure it's what Patrick would have wanted.

Talent

The son and heir to 4 Fuks Saké has changed the dynamic of Friday mornings. Pre and post his arrival the net effect is the same. Thursday night drinking has been replaced by Thursday night screaming. The walk to the station is melancholy. Today I long to sit in silence at Chester-Le-Street under two jumpers and switch my phone off.

I spent 90p on The Guardian. 60 minutes later, all change. I was spat out of the Northern Line at Tottenham Court Road, spirits lifted, and thinking ‘what excellent value for money.’ What the digital / media debate continues to forget is that I spend my 90p on talent, not on sheets of paper or a format. Talent has a price and it's worth paying for. 

Whilst the parallels are often drawn between the revenue models of news media and music (why pay when you can get music/info for free), the debate also conveniently avoids other entertainment vehicles.

Take sport. Should we perhaps convince Arsenal fans not to spend fifty quid on an Emirates ticket on the grounds that there's plenty of football to watch on Hackney Marshes? It's not going to happen.

So why would anyone NOT want to pay for good writing? Reading isn't a function, it's a pleasure.

For my 90p and mood shift I got Marina Hyde’s clinical knifing of Trudie Styler.

Or Harry Pearson…“An English-style centre-forward,” words which are to football what the phrase “contains mechanically reclaimed meat” is to fine dining."

Try The Eurovision “night of a thousand key changes,” guide.

Or Tim Dowling’s MPs expenses quiz.

Paul Calf once said, “you can’t buy class.” He’s right. Newspapers may change their formats and delivery systems, but as long as they supply collections of high quality, talented writing, people will pay. I don't give a monkeys whether I give my 90p to a man in a shop or I drop the coins in the slot on my computer - I'm paying the brand that brings it to me.

These people are professionals. We are amateurs. They’re worth a few quid. 90p's a steal.

Prince. Frog. Rainforests. Save Them

Colin

Introducing Colin. Used to be a pollack, but has had a name change at Sainsbury's. He's a fine fish but needs a profile boost. He's very versatile, good value, and compared with his cod mates - in plentiful supply.

Do the decent thing. Throw the cod back. Pick up Colin.

"You Have To Say That's Magnificent"...

...is what Barry Davies should say in response to the new England kit.

The England shirt. It's important.

As a little under 10 kid in the early 80s, my parents had it easy. I had no interest in Star Wars figures. Couldn't give a monkeys about Action Man. They just had to give me a ball.

I got out of bed every day knowing that one day I would pull on an England shirt and lead out the side at Wembley. I'd have to step out of the football season to lead England at Twickenham during the Five Nations, and naturally in the summer I'd play Test cricket for England.

As a result, I scrutinised the England kit whenever it came out. After all I'd be wearing it in front of millions by the early 1990s. I prayed for simplicity and respect in the design. 25 years later the penny has dropped. I don't care if it's a polo shirt, it looks a bit special.

Umbro have a done good number on it. Lots of interesting stuff to play around with on their site, Flickr, YouTube. There's some pedestrian and obligatory urban wankery based around the "Energy Space," a weak name for a showroom. Simon Mills caustically critiques the design references far better than me.

I can chelp away from the touchline but it's not really fair. Great kit nicely flogged.

Sir Rhodes Boyson

Good to see from The Guardian's weak front page headline yesterday, that digital media is now seen as so simple we'll shortly be teaching it to primary school kids.

Clearly the headline was bullshit, and hid the real story. Nevertheless, let's take the headline at face value. Memories of the late Sir Rhodes Boyson come flooding back - a man from the Victorian era who held an education post in the last Conservative government.

Rhodes and my opinion towards education tend to overlap. We both think it's important to spell things properly, add up and use correct punctuation. However I'm not sure twatting kids with a cane helps them get any better.

Going digital should not mean lazy communication skills. It remains a source of quiet satisfaction that in the early months of my relationship with what became the future Mrs 4 Fuks Saké, she praised me for immaculate spelling in text messages, no matter how drunk I was.

The concern is a general erosion of the English language. Worse - God forbid - an increasing informality in the way we talk to each other. If you're reading this, there's a fair chance you go to business meetings, drink coffee and pitch ideas at people. As a result, I list a collection of words that in retrospect, if ever uttered, deserve a caning.

1. "Guys."

See earlier post.

2. "Grab"

As in, 'shall we grab a latte?' or 'shall we grab a bite to eat?' Either eat or don't. Usually spoken by people who suggest' sharing a starter.'

3. "Let me talk to the guys back at the ranch."

I don't know what I'm doing

4. 'My'

As in 'My account exec,' 'My creative guy,' (or my inferiority complex).

5. To be honest.

(Why? Weren't you being before?)

They'll be more.

Finally to confirm, cunt is a sociably acceptably word.

My Talented Colleagues: ref Sky+HD

Last night's screening of Titanic in high definition for Sky+HD, by my work mates. The Oscars are broadcast in HD for the first time this Sunday, on Sky Movies Premiere and Premiere HD.

Time To Delete 'Digital'

I started to write this blog 2/3 years ago as an outlet for aggression, after listening to anodyne powerpoints about the future of media. It's -1 outside in London, and I'm not hungover 22 floors up in Hong Kong - other than that, the status quo remains.

Still plenty of people who enjoy confusing clients and/or their bosses by using as many digital terms and phrases as possible. It's even more helpful if new apps launch regularly with stupid names. Knowledge/confusion = power and paranoia = hopefully a few quid.

I've been working in essentially PR since '95 and my job's not changed. I persuade people to buy products by getting someone they respect to tell them they should. For those of us who have always been in PR we're not doing anything new - it's just our skills and techniques have had to be radically reinvented.

In 95 I wrote a press release, faxed it and tried to carve a story via a chat with a journalist. If I want to do my job properly in 2009, I have to master the fact that the customer now starts at Google, or heads into their community of mates. I need to press buttons on a keypad and persuade someonethey respect to post, write, share a link, re-tweet my 140 characters or whatever it takes, to get them to say exactly the same thing..."Have you seen this?"

Competitive advantage comes from ideas first and foremost, not which buttons to press. If you have something exciting, exhilarating, moving, engaging - then naturally, people will want to share your ideas with others. Good ideas precipitate conversations that start with the phrase "have you seen this?" Everything underneath (the old skool press release, the Facebook group, the widget, the Twitter feed), is just simple professionalism to share that idea.

Using the term 'digital' as if that in itself is creative, is holding us back. Take it as a given. Shove it in the bin, move on, and move people with ideas 2009 style.